[Ed. notes] - answering a few questions, etc. on yesterday's entry.

First up a special DTOM congrats to Ted McMahan on getting a job. Poor Ted was a victim of the recession when the place he used to work at got raided (and shut down) by the Feds - mortgage stuff not car stuff. Yikes! You can find Ted at Hi-Tech Auto Repair here in the ATL. Ted is a good guy and great mechanic. Ted is a big fan of the blog so shout out!

This week will probably be a little lame in terms of narrative, this is meant more to shock and awe in terms of crazy sh!t that happens around me, then to be a laugh riot. If anything I sugar coated the animosity in the neighborhood over the great wall. It was a total pain in my a$$ and included about 20 pages of handwritten notes of conversations, printed emails, and certified letters. Some good questions that have been raised by the peanut gallery:
a) why didn't you move instead? Well hindsight is 20/20, at the time the location of our house was pretty close to ideal in terms of commute, I would have had to spend quite a bit more to get closer and really if anything we would have wanted to move farther out which would have meant a significant drive for me. Also we were a bit polly anna-ish in terms of "this will be easy" famous last words, you'd think I would know better - well I sure do now!
b) how recent was this? 2004, and I still bear the scars.
c) is "Tommy" that guy's real name? I don't know, I've considered calling Homeland Security to find out. I doubt it, just like IndyJim is my Nome De Plume. I call him a$$hole most of the time.
d) which is more aggravating the wall episode or Barber Motorsports Park. No contest the wall. This was pretty serious since we were talking about thousands of dollars and these tools acted like I wanted to plant a tree. Numnuts even suggested we build a '3' sided fence so that it wouldn't be close to his house, now what the f is the point of a 3 sided fence? Total morons, seriously.


If that curbing wasn't there, this would be a different story, probably involving a medical helicopter...

Now for today's show. This will also be more of a 'look what happened' episode. Christine was off on summer break and actually in the house when this happened. I get a call at work in the afternoon from her. She said, "You're not going to believe this the UPS driver is stuck in our driveway." I said, "What exactly does that mean?"

Turns out this dude was delivering a package that he claimed was heavy. I forget exactly what it was, but Christine picked it up and carried it inside so if your definition is less than 20 lbs, I guess that is accurate. Well Mario Andretti was lazy, it was late in the day and he figured he'd drive it up our hill instead of walking (turns out this is a UPS no-no for good reason). He gets up to the top and that is where his brain shut down. Instead of slowly backing down using his mirrors, or even leaning out and looking behind him, he tries a 3 point turn. Well the 3 point turn can be done, but probably not in a UPS truck. Or at least not with this guy driving.

UPS trucks are rear wheel drive and his was unloaded, so he had no weight over the rear wheels, the engine and all the weight were on the front wheels, when he tried to back up on the incline the rear wheels would just spin. I explained this once I got home several times but he seemed to think he could fix it by putting a board under the rear wheels and other acts of genius. Thankfully once he shot the board out he saw that wasn't going to work, thankfully it didn't go through my truck window or anyone's chest. About 30 min. after I get home and ask him what his plan is, his wife and father-in-law show up. They try again putting like a rubber mat under the tires. At this point I'm done giving advice because no one is listening and its clear we don't have the varsity team on the field.

Two more UPS drivers eventually show up, and each one comes to the "Yep, you're F-d" conclusion and leave. Finally the General Manager of the UPS branch drives out and is standing there scratching his head. He at least had the sense to call a big a$$ semi tow truck. I can't explain how awkward this all was. His wife is henpecking this poor dude, the old man keeps trying to find stuff to wedge under the wheels, the driver is sweating because he thinks I'm p!ssed (which I was but also somewhat amused) and he is going to get fired, then all these other clowns keep showing up shaking their heads, also it has become a neighborhood attraction and people are walking down the street to see if this thing will pitch over our front wall. Good times.

So we've been standing around now for a few hours and the tow truck finally shows up. This guy isn't at the top of his class either, but I pull him aside and show him how the rear end isn't getting grip which he at least understands. He has a tow cable but isn't sure where to put it. Together we determine that if he wraps around the front axle and drags the truck forward it should pivot enough to face down the hill. Or tip over.

Thankfully it pivots and the UPS guy drives away. Of course even after contacting them I get no $$ for the 4 hours they used my driveway as a loading ramp, the burnout marks from this dude practicing his tire warm ups that took like 3 months of rain to wash away, exceeding the driveways weight limit by several tons causing cracks, or the bush he ran into and knocked out of the ground. I guess all's well that ends well.


OH SH!T


That is about a 15ft drop head first.


Tow truck to the rescue.

Labels: Bad Attitude, house horrors, Pics